


Let's all get drunk and make out

by laurature



Category: Jonnor - Fandom, The Fosters
Genre: Jonnor - Freeform, Justify the Means, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-11
Updated: 2015-03-23
Packaged: 2018-03-17 10:37:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3526124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laurature/pseuds/laurature
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Let's all get drunk and make out or the one where Taylor's dad wasnt home and no one got shot.</p>
<p>A rewrite of the ending of episode 2x19 'Justify the Means'</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this at midnight after watching the Fosters and freaking out over the ending. Not my best work but I couldn't live with the ending so I decided to change it. Wasn't going to post it but decided what the heck, other people are probably freaking out over the ending as well so this might help.

"You have a crush on Connor" Taylor says. She isn’t asking me she’s just stating a fact. But she doesn’t seem mad or upset, it was almost like she had said its friday. No more important than anything else said just a fact.  
"How do you-" I don't get to finish cause just as I start to speak we hear the bushes move behind us and Connor emerges hand in hand with Daria. As Connor's eyes find mine he drops Daria's hand and steps in front of her resting both his hands on the bench. His fingers brushing my shoulders. I stand up abruptly.  
"I should be getting home"  
"But aren't we going to-"  
"No" I say cutting him off "no were not." His face falls and I almost want to yell yes lets go just you and I. But I cant I have to be strong.  
"We can break into my house" Taylor says continuing on about how her dad has alcohol, I tune out as Daria fights that it’s not breaking in since she has a key.  
I only pay attention when she says "come on let's all get drunk and make out." She's looking at me like I should be following some secret train of thought of hers. But I’m not following, and I really don’t want to watch Connor and Daria make out all night. I’ve seen more than I can handle of that already.  
When I look over at Connor he's looking at me like I’m dinner and he's been starved his entire life.  
My gut says it’s a bad idea but the butterflies that are taking over cause me to ignore that feeling. Especially with the way Connor keeps looking at me. I look back over at Taylor and she's smiling and nodding like she knows something I don’t.

"So where are your parents?" I ask as Taylor unlocks her back door and we sneak into her house. "They're gone for the weekend some couples retreat. They're trying to fix their marriage." after a beat she adds "its not working. The liquor cabinet is over here."  
Daria follows Taylor but I hang back.  
"Come on" Connor says giving my hand a tug, "it'll be fun."

The liquor burns my throat but after a couple of swigs I don’t feel it as much.  
"I've gotta go to the bathroom" Daria says standing up awkwardly and swaying slightly.  
"I'll take her" Taylor says standing up only slightly straighter and taking Daria by the hand "you boys be good now” she says over her shoulder with a wink.  
Silence fills the room as they leave.  
Then Connor's foot nudges mine. We're both sitting on the floor of Taylor's living room leaving against her couch.  
"This is fun, right?” Connor says to me his voice uncertain. Like he's asking my permission.  
"I guess." I say. He scoots closer so our shoulders are touching and our knees bump.  
"Why were you going to go? I thought we were going to hang out after." His voice is quite and I sneak a look over at him he has the same look he did when I kicked him.  
"Because you seem to be having fun with Daria. Didn’t want to interrupt."  
Connor sighs, and then picks up my hand tracing the lines on my palm. I swallow the lump in my throat and try to take deep breaths but my heart is doing the same racing thing it did at the movies.  
Connor lazily traces the tip of his finger up and down my pinky.  
"But I wanna have fun with you too."  
I pull my hand out of his grasp.  
"Well you can’t have us both so make up your mind." I say angrily.  
I start to get up but he grabs my arms and pulls me back down.  
I struggle against him until we're wrestling like we were in the back yard the other day except instead of laughing like we had been this time it’s all pent up tension. All the times we haven’t touched seem to be coming out now.  
Before I know it Connor is hovering over me. All cloudiness from the alcohol seems to be gone from both of us.  
"Don't go" he says breathlessly, it’s barely a whisper as his face hovers inches above mine.  
"Give me a reason not to then" I say pushing up on his hands that are pining my arms down.  
Time seems to stand still as he hovers over me. Our eyes staring into one and others and then he glances down at my lips and my skin feels like it’s been set on fire.  
Breathe in breathe out, I tell myself as seconds pass. There is a building inside of me, a feeling in my gut that just wont calm down. I’m anxious and excited at the same time.  
His face leans closer to mine and I swallow the lump in my throat, noticing how dry my lips feel all of a sudden.  
And then it happens our lips finally touch.  
It’s not like our first kiss in the tent. There it was a test, a question quick and unsure. And it’s not like our second kiss in my room, that kiss had been more of an answer to the first kiss, his way of saying he wanted to. He wanted to kiss me.  
But this kiss, this third kiss, this kiss on Taylor's living room floor. This is the kiss people talk about.  
The kiss that you feel down to your toes. The slow drawn out kiss that doesn’t seem to end. The kind where you’re not sure if you’re even breathing or maybe your just stealing the other persons air and then they are stealing it back from you.  
As his body comes closer to mine I feel like we're melting into each other. It can’t be much longer than a few seconds of a kiss but it feels like it stretches for all eternity.  
"Oh opps" Taylor's voice comes from the doorway and she lets go a little giggle. Connor and I break a part and Taylor just smiles.  
"Carry on, my work is done." Then she turns and heads back up stairs. "Where's Daria?" I ask as she leaves. "Asleep on my bed, girl can’t hold her booze." Then she walks upstairs and leaves Connor and I staring at each other very confused.


	2. Chapter Two

After Taylor leaves Connor and I just stare at each other for a long while. Neither of us speaking. We've both shifted so that we are lying on the floor side by side. We're not touching just staring at each other. I've moved my arm so it is resting under my head and Connor has done the same. 

Our eyes boring into each others. I swallow the lump in my throat and watch as he lifts his other hand and places it in the space between our bodies. His pinky reaching out into the open space.   
I shift my eyes from his down to his hand and then back up. His lip twitches and he looks at my hand that lays by my side.   
I close my eyes and slowly bring my hand up and rest it beside his. Letting my pinky reach out for him.   
Our eyes lock onto each others and my breathing increases. The corner of his lips turn up in a smile. And I feel myself doing the same. Our pinkies reach out just like at the movies. Lightly grazing each others, the tiny touch.  
He runs his finger down mine and I run mine back up his until they both lock around each other.   
We lay there saying nothing with words, speaking only in small touches and the secret in our smile.   
Eventually we both fall asleep our hands holding on to each other for dear life. 

When I wake in the morning, my eyes flutter open and the first thing I see is Connor's face inches from mine.   
He's smiling.   
“Were you watching me sleep?” I say as I scoot a little closer to him.   
“Maybe...” he says “is that weird?”   
I just smile and shake my head, I look down at our hands and smile even more they are still intertwined.   
“What time is it?” I ask looking over his shoulder for a clock.   
“Just after nine.”   
I nod but don't make any move to get up. Moms are probably worried about me, and Callie is probably freaking out but in this moment my brain just doesn't care.   
Because I know that last night was just a perfect moment in time and that it's not real life, at least not yet. So with a shaky breath I ask “Where's Daria?” as I pull my hand out of Connor's and sit up.   
The hurt is written all over his face and he sits up too his foot brushing mine,   
“Upstairs I think... what does it matter?”   
“She's your girlfriend.” I say the words burning on my tongue.   
“Jude...” his voice is soft and makes my heart pound. He reaches for my hand but I pull back.  
“You need to decide. Me or her, you can't have both of us. I won't do it anymore.” I stand up and move away from him. Needing the distance so I don't just fall back into him.   
“Jude?” his voice cracks and his eyes look like they are filling with tears.  
“I'm sorry Connor.” I say and I take another step back. “Maybe I'll see you around, tell Taylor and Daria I had to go.” my chest in heavy and my foot steps feel like I'm walking through quicksand. I fight back the urge to turn and look at him. I make my way to the patio door we came in through last night and open the door. The creak it makes echos through the house and I swear it matches the one that is breaking though my heart.   
I pause before I take a step though the door, and take a deep breath of the cool morning air. It doesn't help to clear my head. All I can think of is the look on Connor's face. The feeling of his hand in mine. The way I wanted to snuggle closer to him last night.   
I take another deep breath and blink away the tears that have formed in my eyes, taking a step through the door.   
I think I hear my name being said as I slide it closed behind me but I don't look up to see.   
I couldn't take it if he wasn't standing there.   
So I keep walking. Every step feeling like I'm leaving a trail of pieces of my heart. Like bread crumbs that Connor can follow back to me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys liked this Chapter, I'd love your feed back. I wrote this real quick just now, I had intended this to only be a one shot but then I got some ideas for more so I thought I'd add it.   
> Again hope you all like it and thanks for reading :)


	3. Chapter 3

The bike ride home seemed to take twice as long as it had taken to get there last night.  
The sun is high in the sky by the time I tuck my bike away in the garage and make my way up our front steps. Before I even reach the door its flying open and Callie is stepping onto the porch.  
“Where have you been!? We've been worried sick. No call, no note. We just find your bed empty this morning.” she doesn't take a single breath as all of this rolls out of her mouth, staring me down and blocking my way inside.  
“Well?” she says raising her eyebrows and making it look like her eyes are about to pop out of her head. “Where were you Jude?”   
I try and side step around her, not looking up.  
“Jude you can't just disappear!”   
My head flips up and I lock eyes with her. “I know that, I'm not you! I fell asleep okay?!”  
Her forehead scrunches together as I stand up taller and our eyes become level. I've grown recently but she still only sees me as her little brother.   
“I'm not you Callie. I wouldn't run away. I have a family. I got adopted. I'm not going to screw that up. I'm a teenager, I snuck out. I get that I'm in trouble. But your not my mom, moms our my moms now they can yell at me if they want. But you...butt out of my life!” I push my way past her and up into the house.   
I know later I'll regret saying those things to her but right now I am so tired of her treating me like a baby all the time.   
Steph and Lena are both standing in the doorway to the living room. Steph's arm is around Lena and I can tell from the look on their faces they heard everything.  
I pause in front of them and look down. “I'm sorry I worried you. I really didn't mean too. We were just supposed to hang out for a bit and then I'd sneak back in and no one would know.”   
I look up at them now hoping they know that I really do mean it. “I know I shouldn't have snuck out I just wanted to hang out with...” my voice trails off and I cast my gaze down again. “I'm sorry I snuck out.”  
“Jude honey, we were just worried. You need to tell us these things.” Steph says stepping forward and pulling me into a hug. “We're not mad at you, but why wouldn't you just say that you wanted to hang out with Connor. We would have let you go.”  
“That's not the point, I wanted to sneak out. I wanted to be alone with him. I didn't want anyone to know.” my voice cracks and I feel tears starting to form.  
“Jude what is it?” Lena says walking over and kneeling in from of me taking my hands in hers.  
“He kissed me and now we're just... I don't know. He's dating Daria but at the movies he held my hand and then when we're alone it seems like he likes me but I just don't get him. I don't get it.” all these words come spilling out of my mouth and then tears are rolling down my cheeks and Lena is ushering me into the living room. Sitting me at the couch with her and Steph sitting in front of me.  
“Connor kissed you?!” Callie says from the doorway her mouth hanging open.  
“Love can you give us a minute to talk to Jude alone?” Steph says her eyes pleading with Callie to just let them handle this. I'm grateful for the because I wouldn't be able to take Callie's commentary right now.  
Callie huffs and marches upstairs.   
“Okay Jude, we are talking about Connor right?” Lena asks. I nod and look down at my hands. Running my thumb across my pinky.   
“When did all of this happen?” Steph says looking between Lena and I. Lena shrugs her shoulders and they both look back at me.  
“We kissed on the camping trip. Well he kissed me in the tent... remember...sorry I lied about that too, I just didn’t' want Connor's dad-”  
“Its okay honey we understand.” Lena says patting my knee.   
“Keep going”   
I sigh “After that it was like he forgot it happened so I just figured whatever we'll be friends cause at least then I get to be around him. And he started dating Daria... but then at the movies he held my hand.”  
“and I don't know then after that it was like he forgot he did that too. So I just figured okay whatever. But then I got mad. Really mad. And when he was sleeping over last weekend...I kicked him.”  
“You kicked him?” Steph says with a laugh and Lena gives her a look that says are you seriously laughing right now and Steph shrugs again.  
“Yeah and then he kissed me. Again.”  
“Wait you kicked him and he kissed you?” Lena questions.   
“Yes!” I throw my hands up and Steph and Lena both just smile at me.  
“Honey we're just trying to follow along.”  
“Sorry.” I say and continue “so then he kissed me and it seemed like we were going to be something. But he's still dating Daria. But he comes over and we study and he says stuff or does stuff that makes it seem like he's interested in me and Daria wanted to TP a house and Connor said we'd hang out after and we did and we kissed again but then I left cause he's still with Daria and I can't take it anymore. I can't be a secret.” I suck in a deep breath and try to stop the tears that are forming.   
“It hurts though. It hurts being with him but not being with him at the same time. And it hurts even more walking away from him and not being his friend. But I don't want to just be his friend I want to be more. I want .... I don't know what I want. I just don't want to feel this way.” tears are flowing over my eyes now and Lena gets up and sits beside me on the couch pulling me into her.  
“Oh sweetheart. I know, I know.” she tucks my head into her and rocks me back and forth.   
The tears don't stop but it is comforting. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my chest.   
“I'm so sorry I snuck out, and I didn't mean those things I said to Callie either and I -”  
“Honey it's okay Callie knows and you can apologize later. We're just happy you told us everything.”  
Lena holds me in her arms until I stop crying and then even after that she just holds me.   
I don't even hear the door bell ring until Mariana walks into the room and says  
“Jude, Connor's here to see you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I just keep seem to be writing more so I hope everyone is enjoying it. :)   
> Again I'd love to hear your feedback and let me know what you'd like to see more of.  
> I really am just winging this story as I go, so hopefully it turns out okay. I like the direction it's going in though so I will probably continue at least for a couple more chapters.


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it has taken me so long to update, I kept trying to write this chapter but I was never happy. I think I like it now though so here is it chapter four, again sorry for the long wait.  
> Hope you enjoy, and if you have a comment or any ideas let me know in the comments below I love reading them :)  
> Laura

I stand my legs tremble as I nod to moms. Letting them know I am okay to talk to him. They nod as well and stand up.   
“You can send him in.” I say to Mariana trying to keep my voice steady.   
“He's just in here” I hear Mariana saying and I steady myself taking a deep breath for what is about to come.  
Connor appears in my view standing in the doorway to the living room.   
He is fidgeting with his hands and he tugs at his flannel shirt.   
He must have gone home and changed because he wasn't wearing that last night.  
“We'll let you two talk.” Lena says as she puts a hand on Steph's back and they both exit the room taking Mariana with them.  
Now it's just us. Connor and I. Me and Connor.   
I shift on the spot and wait for Connor to say something.   
He shifts also and chews on his lower lip, his eyes glancing around the room before settling on me.  
“Hey Jude.” his voice his low and I instinctively step closer to him.  
“Connor.” I say keeping my voice as neutral as I can but I'm afraid it deceives me because he lets out a little smile.  
“I broke up with Daria.” he says taking a step towards me, his smile growing.   
“That's nice.” I say trying to hide the thunder of my heart as it beats in my ear.  
“and I told my dad that I want to be with you.” I stare at him then, not quite sure if I heard him right.  
“What?” I stutter out.   
“Well I texted him, that I want to be with you...That you're the one I want to date.” Connor pauses and looks down at his shoes. “I don't think he's gotten it yet, he's at the office so he probably won't check his phone until later but I told him.”  
Connor looks back up at me now “I don't know how he'll react, probably not well which is why I raced over here to tell you and I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner. But I'm so afraid my dad won't let us be friends anymore. Cause you know how he reacted to the whole tent thing and I just” he gulps in a breath and stares at me his eyes glassy and searching mine. “Did I do the right thing Jude?”  
His words are like a kick to the gut, I don't know what comes over me but the next thing I know I've closed the space between us and reaching up on my tippy toes I press my lips into his.  
His one hands comes to rest on my face and his other hand on my hip. My eyes flutter closed as I press my lips deeper into his, and let my hands find his waist.   
We stay like that for a moment, lost in time as all the air in the room gets sucked out of it and we are the only ones left.   
I lower myself off of my tippy toes and realize I am almost the same height as him now.   
“Whoa” Connor breathes out in a whisper and I can only nod. “What was that for?” Connor says as my eyes flutter back open and I see him staring at me. His eyes wide and filled with questions.  
Before I can answer though he brings both his hands up to my cheeks and pulls me into another kiss.   
It's feather light and makes my head buzz more than the alcohol did last night.   
His lips are soft and I realize I never knew lips could be so soft.   
Although I don't have any experience in kissing other lips I still don't think any lips are as soft as his.   
When we pull apart it's slow, like neither one of us want to break the spell we are under.  
His arms fall to around my back and he holds me there against him. I don't move out of his arms but I do swallow the lump in my throat.   
“You're right.”  
“I am?” he asks unsure of what I'm about to say.  
“I'm so proud of you telling your dad, I want to be with you too. But...he probably wont take it well.”  
Connor adverts his gaze and frowns, the smile that was on his face turning into a straight line.   
I nudge his nose with mine and he looks back up at me, our eyes locking on each others.   
“I wanted to kiss you in case we're not able to for a while.”  
He nods understanding what I'm saying.   
We don't know how his dad will react, chances are he'll try and separate us.   
“But we'll be okay right?” Connor asks I can barely hear him.  
“We'll get through this.” I say tightening my arms around him.  
He tightens his arms around me too, and rests his head on top of mine.   
“Promise?” he whispers in my ear.  
“Pinky promise.” I say into his chest.


End file.
